For kicks, I checked out Christianity Today’s forum… So, there’s this:
Q. I have a friend who has a real problem with money. He brags about how much he makes from his part-time job and stockpiles money. In fact, he won’t take his girlfriend out because “it costs too much.” Every time I try to talk about it, he blows me off and denies there’s a problem. What can I tell him?
Recall, you’re reading an atheist’s blog here. In case that wasn’t immediately obvious.
Tell him he’s a cheap piece of shit and if he actually wants to hang onto this girl, he needs to be willing to blow a li’l dough toward her happiness.
That said, maybe the girl’s okay with Mr. Cheapskate and loves the fact that he gets free movies from the library and offers her cheap popcorn to snack on while they laugh at the classics. I get all my entertainment free from my local, as it happens. I love the library. Go get yourselves some library cards, for fucks’s sake!
(1 minion’s opinion. Never forget!)
The answer given:
The way we handle money is very much a spiritual issue. Did you know there are more than 2,350 verses about money in the Bible? Why? A book called Your Money Counts by Howard Dayton explains that how we use money is important for three reasons: 1) it impacts our fellowship with God; 2) it’s the chief competitor with Christ for lordship over our lives; 3) money molds our characters. Reading what the Bible says about money is challenging and enriching. (For starters, check out: Luke 16:11, Matthew 6:24, 1 Chronicles 29:11-12.)
Unless you’re a dipshit from the school of the prosperity gospel and Joel Osteen, you’re going to understand money – and the access of it – might not be the answer to the problem.
I once had a guy in my youth group a lot like your friend. He was always bragging about money. He drove a really nice car and always dressed in the most expensive clothes he could get. As I spent more time with him, I realized he was an insecure guy with a really poor self-image. I believe his material comforts and boasting helped him feel better about who he was. He wanted to impress others with his material wealth. Interestingly enough, when God got hold of him, his heart toward money changed radically. He lost his love for money and found his true calling with God. Please pray that something like that happens with your friend.
This isn’t something that needs a god thought in order to change, though. To my way of thinking. Some people just get it into their heads that money matters more than personality or responsibility. That people aren’t people unless they can somehow be bought and paid for. In this way of seeing things, though, everyone is merely a means to an end. In this case, an end that can be tallied by number of pennies..
If you know people who thinks value is only assigned by one’s weight in gold, it’s worthwhile to ask those people why. What have they been missing in their relations with other people? And then ask yourself, are you equipped to help this person sort through their preconceived notions, or is this better left on the desk of a professional?