I can’t watch Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter

An Ontario theatre is celebrating the film’s 10th year as a cult classic tonight and I’m in the wrong province to enjoy it, dammit all.

Here’s a chance to live the Ottawa b-movie staple Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter all over again on the very big screen at the Mayfair Theatre.

Some of the original cast (Santo included!) will be in attendance to celebrate the film that arguably spawned the now thriving independent film scene in town. Of course, whether that’s a good or bad thing is open to debate, but there’s no debating the sheer entertainment value when Jesus takes on the undead. As the robed one, Phil Caracas is kick-ass splendid in a role that requires physical gymnastics, spiritual enlightenment, skateboarding prowess and a song or two.

“Damn them! Damn them all to hell!!” Oh wait. I’m quoting the wrong cult classic.

Sounds like just the kind of film I’d enjoy. I suppose if I really do want to see the thing, I can find it online somewhere but geez, big screen. Big screen!!

I’ll get over it.. I’ll just spend the day mumbling about the sad lack of teleporters is all…

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One Response to I can’t watch Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter

  1. Adam says:

    I’ve added it to my netflix queue, if you’re interested it’s classified there as :

    Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter
    (2001) NR
    This indie film garnered awards on the festival circuit, including Slamdance, Zombiedance, the Fargo Film Festival and the Santa Cruz Film Festival. The far-out story has Jesus finally returning to Earth -- but he must contend with a world under assault by a band of vampires. Mary Magnum and the god of Mexican wrestling, El Santos, help Jesus fight evil in this oddball horror-comedy.
    Genre: Vampires, Spoofs and Satire, Cult Comedies
    This movie is: Goofy, Quirky
    Format: DVD, Blu-ray and streaming
    
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