I’m selecting this odd numbered entry to highlight a few of the one-offs, the strange searches that inexplicably led to me; a nod to those daring people who hunt for the most elusive answers of all. I can’t guarantee they’ll find any here, but keep trying and good hunting, all of you.
Who’s on first? Whoever searched for “funny old roman comics”
Emperor Nero could have been a stand up comedian. “Oh, what a great night, ladies and gentlemen, I’m on fire! No, wait.. you are!!! bhwwhwhwhahahahahha!!!”
“You say I played the fiddle, the night Rome burned. Lyre.”
What’s on second? “wardrobe theft” apparently.
I gotta Google that myself now.
A wardrobe is an accessible room in a safehouse in both Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Grand Theft Auto IV that allows the player to change the protagonist’s clothing.
I presume it’s to elude the police, right? Not just because players of the game want to see CG dudes with their kit off?
And someone made off with some of Victoria Beckham’s wardrobe back in 2007. Judging by the photo provided on site, it’s clear the perpetrator must’ve been nuts.
I dunno’s on third, somebody desperate for information on a “satanic eyeball parasite”
I don’t know if they’re looking to buy one, or sell one. Was there a specific parasite in mind here? The Loa loa seems like the one most fun to contemplate.
Humans are the only known host of adult Loa loa. They typically live in subcutaneous tissue. But they also breed like bunnies, pumping out thousands of tiny threadlike larvae that ride through the bloodstream on a daily basis. At night, they collect inside lung tissue. During the day, they move out to the veins under the skin and wait on the off chance that they’ll get sucked out by their second host – a biting fly.
Once the larvae are inside the fly, they bore through its gut tissue, migrate to its muscles, molt a couple of times, then finally move into the fly’s proboscis. They wait for the fly to bite someone else, and crawl into the wound. New host!
It takes the larvae about 6 months to become adults. But they can live inside human tissues for 15 to 17 years.
Someone’s trying to justify their dark desires with a little music – “lyrics ‘you can stone your wife’ ”
Oh, that might be related to Prop 8, the Musical, which “starred” Jack Black as Jesus. I didn’t bother checking that out. I don’t really like Jack Black and I pretty much said the same thing when I wrote about this before. The only show I liked him in was High Fidelity because he was less obnoxious but still funny and likable.
“can a man make a cow pregant?” “can a man make a cow pregnant?”
Must have been. He asked twice.
Okay, that wraps up this round. I’ll save up a few more and do this again sometime.